It’s our anniversary! We just hit our 366 days of being married, 2020 is a leap year remember. So honored to spend this special wedding anniversary edition of Monday Lunch with you. But just so you know, I clearly wrote this before today because I wouldn’t dare take up time on our anniversary to write an email. Now I love y’all, but I love Bae more!
Today’s Topics:
SC Living, Chapter 2
September 21
RBG
BlackGirls in/with...
SC Living, Chapter 2
I always make fun of those HOA TV commercials. You know the ones where the HOA comes around regulating what people have in their yards.
TELL ME WHY we got a warning notice from our HOA about our grass being over code. First of all, we just moved into the damn house. The notice was cited the 1st week in July but didn’t receive it until mid-July. Talking about our grass needs to be tended to or we are going to get a fine. Excuse me, come again?!
We looked at that letter like you’ve gotta be kidding. They even included a picture of the front of our house with this so-called grass over code. It looked fine to us. So now Julian has to get out here in this front yard at least once every 7-9 days and cut the grass so Permit Patty doesn’t come fine us.
That’s all. I just needed to rant. Been holding that one in.
September 21, 2001 / 2019
As a little girl, I never really dreamed about a wedding, but I knew I wanted to get married. I more so would dream about what my future husband would be like, our home, life, and kids. I had no idea what type of wedding I wanted, but I knew exactly what type of marriage I wanted.
When I was around 10 my dad was diagnosed with a rare brain cancer. He hit his head getting out of the car picking me up from one of those all-nighter skating ring parties. We chatted about those in Vol.2. And what was once dormant, turned malignant. At least that is what the doctors said.
September 21, 2001, around 3:30/4p my father closed his eyes. I remember this moment like it was just yesterday. I had just came home from school, went into his room gave him a kiss, and then went to my room shut the door, and started homework. About 30 minutes later, my grandmother came in and told me he was gone. I was 15. I had no idea how much of an impact this was going to be on my life.
It was a Friday. My high school had a football game, and I still went with my secret HS boyfriend, my grandpa actually thought he was a girl because he was a little husky and had long plats with beads. Pop-pop’s eyesight wasn’t the best, and things like this is exactly why teenagers love their grandparents, you get away with sooooo much.
Anywho, 3 hours after my dad passed I was sitting in the bleachers staring off into space. No idea how or what to do next. I just knew I couldn’t sit in the house, alone.
As I got older, memories of my dad faded away but came back in full color once I started understanding love. When I had my first real love and person I thought I would marry when I was 20 years old, I had my first moment of “my dad won’t be there to walk me down the aisle”. And all the feelings of losing my dad came rushing back tome 5 years later, I think it was my first real cry.
I was so caught up in masking my feelings by sneaking out the house, being obsessed with boys, getting a car, and going off to college that between the ages of 15-20, I didn’t think too much about my loss.
And then I hit my mid-20s when the first round of friends get married. When I was 25/26, I went to 12 weddings in one year. TWELVE!!! And if there was a father/daughter dance I would always bury my face into my purse, look the other way, or if the exit was near I would get up and escape to the “bathroom”.
Watching that part reminded me that I would never get that moment, and it was too painful to witness. Yea, I had some friends who had their mothers walk them down the aisle and do mother/daughter dances, but I didn’t want that. I was/am a daddy’s girl. 19 years later I still am. He can still do no wrong in my eyes.
Fast forward to me getting to my happily ever after, Julian. God knew exactly what I needed in a life-partner, so he took his time. I appreciate it now.
Once he asked me to be his wife exactly 365 days after our first DATE, yes, date, (Got’em 😉) we decided on a fall wedding. I looked at Saturday’s in October, September, and November on my phone. I quickly scrolled back to September and saw it crystal clear. September 21st was a Saturday. How more perfect can this get?
Now if you remember, my dad waited until I got home from school on that Friday afternoon, or at least that I what I love to believe he did. So when we were planning our wedding, the idea of a brunch came about. Julian and I love brunch, coffee, mimosas, and day functions. So the theme fit perfectly. But also, I wanted to get married on a day and time my dad was still alive.
So at approximately 11am-ish. We jumped the broom. And our wedding ended at 3:30pm. So you see, my dad did get to join us for our special day. He was alive and well dancing to the sound of our DJ, he had no rhythm, and my husband doesn’t really either, but hey I think that is why I love him SOOO much because I can see my dad non-dancing behind when I look at Julian, and eating our yummy lemon cake, also one of my dad’s favorites that has now become mine.
We turned a day that use to make me sad into a day that I will always remember as one of the happiest moments of my entire life.
Also, who can say that they have a song by Earth, Wind & Fire that describes their wedding perfectly!
I love you Julian, happy first anniversary, and cheers to many more together.
Daddy, thank you for being everything I needed then, and even more of what I need now.
Notorious RGB
When this broke, I was laying on the couch watching a show with Julian, when he said “Oh man”, and it was said in the same tone when he found out Chadwick and Kobe died. So I knew it was bad.
I didn’t even want to look at my group chat, and still haven’t as I am writing this because we always talk about how we need to hold on to her just a little bit longer and we have almost passed the finish line and Ruth could finally sit back and stop fighting these racist white men in America.
(taking a minute to skim my group chats)
Yup, this sums up the responses. This one hit America like a ton of bricks, not only because she was a huge voice we had and needed in our system. But with the election around the corner, it stings even more.
Ruth Bader Ginsburg, I can’t wait to tell my future daughters/sons about what you stood for, and how you never gave up. I am forever grateful that I was able to witness just a small part of your legacy.
We have to VOTE more than ever this election. We canNOT give 45 another chance.
@BlackGirlsInTraderJoes
I’ve become a huge fan of this IG account over the past year. I randomly found them in the comments of another Trader Joes fan page that I was following and soon after I saw the profile, I unfollowed that one and followed my melanated sisters.
But from this, I have stumbled on so many #BlackGirlMagic pages that just celebrate us. Take a look and follow some or all. It will give you the feels that you need on your timeline.
Black Girls With Gardens - this one is ALL the greenery feels you need.
Ladies, you might want to check this one out - Black Men With Gardens, #yourwelcome
And they say we don’t like dogs - Black Girls With Dogs
Black Girls Who Paint - Who needs some art?
Well Read Black Girl - you should know this one already!
Black Jeep Girls - Now this is a trend I can get with. Who wants to ride in the Jeep? *Beep Beep*
Black Girls Breathing - Breathe, Heal and Grow together
There are so many others, but these are the few that are my favorites!
Well, that is it for this wedding anniversary edition of Monday Lunch! Leave a comment or like and tell me what you think. And as always, please share with someone in your circle. I appreciate the love!
I was weak at the roller rink story. And loved the September 21 love story/ remembrance of your Pops.
Happy Anniversary!!